Verse in praise of circumcision

by Dr Edgar Schoen

Former Chair of the AAP Taskforce on Circumcision that produced the AAP's 1989 policy


Published in


Ode to the Circumcised Male

We have a new topic to heat up our passions --
the foreskin is currently top of the fashions.
If you're the new son of a Berkeley professor,
your genital skin will be greater, not lesser.
For if you've been circ'ed or are Moslem or Jewish,
you're outside the mode; you are old-ish not new-ish.
You have broken the latest society rules;
you may never get into the finest of schools.
Noncircumcised males are the "genital chic"--
if your foreskin is gone, you are now up the creek.
It's a great work of art like the statue of Venus*,
if you're wearing a hat on the head of your penis.
When you gaze through a looking glass, don't think of Alice;
don't rue that you suffered a rape of your phallus.
Just hope that one day you can say with a smile
that your glans ain't passe; it will rise up in style.

Edgar J. Schoen, MD
Department of Pediatrics
Kaiser Permanente Medical Center
280 W MacArthur Blvd
Oakland, CA 94611

*An extraordinarily poor example considering the condition of her arms.



Schoen EJ. Re: Uncircumcision: a technique for plastic reconstruction of a prepuce after circumcision. J Urol 1990; 146: 1619.

Circumcision Revision (1987)

Every circumcised male (who has suffered assault)
Can have the wrong righted, regardless of fault.
No need to accept it, you should be advised
It can be corrected, reversed or revised.

If it upsets your psyche, just have it erased
By a small piece of skin that's strategically placed.
If your foreskin is gone, just find the right surgeon,
Who'll sew one back on without any urgin'.

We could call the procedure a phimorrhoplasty*,
You'll be put back in shape, though it sounds very nasty.
An alternate name is "reverse circumcision";
If you like the idea you're a person with vision.

It comes to my mind that this chic reconstruction
Creates an addition in place of reduction.
Your glans should be covered, it shows that you care,
For fashion demands that you cannot go bare.

*No we couldn't - phimorrhoplasty would be a "muzzle-flow-shaping"

It was Dr Robert Van Howe who suggested a response in verse would be appropriate.

by Vernon Quaintance

[convicted of possessing child pornography in 2012]

Decision Some people claim that foreskins are fun
And keep the 'muzzle' on the gun.
But many doctors do declare;
'It's healthier with the glans laid bare'
So, mum & dad, we say to you,
You must decide what's best to do,
Your son will benefit throughout his life,
As, incidentally, will his wife;
If you make the choice that's always wise
and do decide to circumcise.

- attirbuted to Vernon Qua[i]ntance,
by Prof Brian J Morris on his website.


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